How to work with validating couples lesbian dating ads
Bombarding our partner with criticism does not encourage cooperation.Appreciation builds positive energy (the spoonful of sugar), where complaints deplete positive energy, unless delivered in a language that can be heard.We teach couples that this type of understanding often brings them closer, generating greater trust.If couples wish to maintain a lasting, joyful relationship, this second step is not optional; it is required.“If I compliment him, he will think he is perfect and he will ignore my needs,” she says. Everyone needs daily doses of appreciation to help our relationships grow.She must hit the delete key on her complaint list and use the insert key to offer as much praise as she can muster.Step 6: A Loving Relationship Requires Accepting Each Other’s Different Values Carla says, “I can’t believe how he wants to waste money on a fancy car just to show off for his friends!
This helps them take in the full joy from both the analytical (neocortex) and emotional (limbic) parts of the brain, thus strengthening their love bond.
Therapists need to help couples express themselves fully, mirroring and validating the other’s ideas.
When validated, a person is more likely to move to a common ground.
Couples tend to believe that if love is strong, it is “meant to be” and they will live happily with minimal conflict.
If it were, the world would be quite different, and breakups and divorces would be a thing of the past.